try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
The things that come out of my body both amaze and disturb me.
I think I know how big ted kennedy's penis is.
It's like a choose-your-own-adventure. But the adventure is already chosen for you. And it sucks.
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
I'm pretty sure getting a blow job behind a bar in Rome while her little sister is throwing up in a dumpster not 5 feet away, gives entirely new meaning to the phrase "When in Rome"
Your maid of honor is passed out in a golf cart on the 18th hole.
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
First of all guys don't have walks of shame. Secondly there is nothing more epic than riding the skytrain in a toga while everyone else is going to work
How much money would it take for the bouncer to get us beers while we wait in line to get in?
$450 apparently whoopwhoop
If he doesn't fuck you on the 4th of July, he doesn't really love this country.
That's not "anything", that's you deep throating a mozzarella stick.
Yelled "don't taze me bro" as the police officer tazed me. Cross it off the list.
Im 76 percent sure I took a fully clothed shower last night.
Randomize
