Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
apparently i traded the tiffany necklace my mom bought me for 2 shots and next in line for beer pong at the frat.
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
Brought out my three foot martini glass last night, that explains why I haven't left my bed all day long.
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
I banged her roommate when she was gone. She came back with a chicken sandwich and a bj. Then she said " smells like my roommates vagina" I think I can get a threesome tonight
I have to take his virginity. It's what God put me on earth for. It's my life mission.
Oh, and trying to figure out who wants to do Molly in a frat is like asking damn children if they want puppies and candy. So just bring as much as possible.
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
He wanted to watch the vow, cuddle, and not have sex. An upgrade is in order.
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
How do you make a Facebook status saying how much you fucking hate yourself without being aggressive enough for people to worry about your safety
Cuz that's where I'm at
so i showed up to the bars in a sombrero and a tie as a headband... so yeah, they didn't let me in
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