ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
She said you were bangin on the counters of McDonalds singing "These Eyes" at 4am
I woke up this morning to 7 word documents that all said "remember to be extremely angry at your jerk of a brother." What the hell did you do to me last night?
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
you cant ever make fun of my bong's stick on moustache again. its the reason the cop let me keep it and my weed.
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
I saw a groundgog last night outside my back door. I now have a new wedding gift idea.
It was technically 11... But I go by McDonald's time, if they aren't servin breakfast, it's the afternoon. Therefore I can drink
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
If I died tonight, I'd be content knowing you were the last person to see my boobs.
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
Just had a customer call his drug dealer in front of me but act like it was normal call.
When we get drunk one of us ends up running off and fucking someone in an inappropriate place, like the roof of the restaurant, or Greece, while the other convinces people not to worry and not to go looking. That good sir is a real mother fucking friendship.
Thats what I'm talking about
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
Randomize