i just wanna soil my oats bro
Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
She is sending me pics of her sex faces...which totally counts as sexting in my book
I'm using toast as a chaser. If I wasn't already so fucked up this would be revolting.
Myy bathroom floor makes me think I'm on Mars. Also. Did you realize that yesterday we perfected thee mind high-five??
Well the weed wore off around 10:30 and then the date dragged on until about 1 in the morning. So I've decided I really need to start smoking closer to the actual start time of a date. Then maybe they'd be more bearable.
Just thinking about this summer makes me feel a slight tingle of an orgasm mixed with a twinge of regret as the cold ghostly feeling of multiple hangovers creep into my body.
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
No we were too stoned to stop you from wiping the peanut butter all over the car.
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
Randomize
