your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
i'm in hospital, i have an exam in 3 hours and the man in the cubicle next to me is doing a noisy poo. this has to get better.
Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
True story: Just left my solo cup on a cop car. Yesss
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
You should make cookies and when I get home we can have a slow motion hug and eat them
when I was too drunk to walk on my own two feet, he stole a shopping cart from the grocery store at the corner and proceeded to wheel me back to my apartment.
Then he tucked me in, gave me a goodnight kiss and slept on my sofa. I woke up this morning and he was making waffles.
he is a god among men.
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
Uhh I just had to break up with a guy who I didn't even know I was dating...
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
Grandpa just whipped it out and started pissing on the way to the game stuck in traffic. I saw EVERYTHING. :(
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Randomize
