i could't wear that belt anymore, it was gonna make me keep shitting for the rest of the night
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
Ok, so for future reference, in Rome, "piano bar" means "brothel".
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
I want someone to sweep me off my feet and you want someone to fuck you on the kitchen table. They're both perfectly logical needs.
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
Can you work for me at 4? We might have just taken some drugs we found in the couch and... end of story
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
In reference to the club we were headed to our cab driver told us about the time he had sex with a woman on the dance floor there. And what do you know, they're celebrating their 22 marriage anniversary together this year! True love does exist!
I wiped my ass with a McDonalds wrapper. I've hit an all time low. Sorry for my impatience
In order to get rid of my bladder infections I must give up caffeine, nicotine and tight pants. It's like my pussy is an angry dictator or something
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