There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
If my body was a temple, I pissed all over the front stairs last night..
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
there is a dude in the bar with no arms getting fed beers by his friends
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
All i've had today is coffee and ketchup packets. I need a job like yesterday.
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
You kept going up to guys in plaid and screaming "are you a lumberjack" in their faces
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
If I had a dick, I'd stick it in some Oreo pancakes
Someone put pennies in the toilet. This isn't a fucking wishing well
Fireball goes down like mother's milk. Btw your housemate is naked
I just walked by a dude at the gym covering himself in olive oil.
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Randomize
