You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
Dude I totally just watched a girl put a tampon soaked in vodka up her vag
I need new friends
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
I don't want to tell anyone! People who sleep with senators either end up in porn or guantanamo
The man who lives downstairs is fluent in Russian, and also a playboy. You should meet.
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
No more pre-dentist shots, I just puked on my hygienist
Omg I'm having dinner at chilli's with a guy who is arguing that getting a weed leaf tatoo on his neck will prevent him from getting a job as a dental assistant
Well that actually sounds reasonable
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
How in the fuck did you get LIVE MOTHER FUCKING BATS!?!?! Into my ROOM last night????
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