Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
She looked like her face caught fire, and someone put it out with a screwdriver.
I woke up this morning with a bag of pepperonis in my bed.... and my facebook status was "pepperonis"
you told all the 17 year old girls at the party that your mating call was "I glitter in the sun"
just walked past a girl in her cap and gown puking her brains out beside a tree. her friends were taking pictures of her.
The only downside so far to having a guy roommate is that when he's doing a walmart run, I just can't bring myself to ask him to pick up a pregnancy test for me. I feel like that's just too much too soon.
Jeff just maced a waitress...it's way too early for this.
I think I explained what happened in the voicemail. But I think I might have just cried and ranted about how cool osiris shoes are
I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing
Please stop using me as a reference for bail bondsmen.
The night is not complete until I am drnk and speaking to inanimate objects
Just zoned back in to real life and found myself chanting "noodle eater noodle eater noodle eater" at my parrot as he devoured a single macaroni
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
Randomize
