Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
Guess what I'm doing tomorrow?
Becoming a productive member of society?
Sam. Come on.
There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
just found out i fit into magnum condums. this is going to be the best weekend ever
Just got a lecture from Dad about how I need to be more responsible and start buying my weed in larger quantities so that i can save money. Like he was serious and kind of disappointed in me for not adapting to his method earlier.
She just looked at him and said "I'm gonna fuck that" and it totally worked.
Doing lines off a plate that says, "things go better with coke."
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
The fact that you screamed, "Alf is my spirit animal!" is proof enough that we're too old for peyote.
All I want is a wedding with a dress and a veil and where I can go and my cat can go.
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
In between explaining the best feminist lenses for the myth of Persephone and doing vodka shots with my friends she dragged me into my car and gave me an Earth shattering blow job. Honestly I think I'm in love.
can you tell me why i woke up in a diaper and combat boots?
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
Randomize
