I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
Remember the time we were horrifically hung over, went to mcdonalds, an you merely felt the weight of the mcnuggets box and knew there was an extra?
like it was yesterday
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
We decided to cut you off after you insisted on eating peanuts by the dumpster
i honestly don't know why someone didn't cut me off after i broke the ceiling lamp with MY HEAD
I just bared my soul to you and you fell asleep. Or you're fucking your boyfriend. Either way, not cool. fuck.
Remember when I said "no boyfriend, no problems"? I lied. Tequila. Tequila is a problem.
I ripped the door frame off last night too. Just remembered.
I'm having salsa con queso and a leftover half-drank/flat red bull for breakfast. Nothing you propose doing today would be a downgrade.
As he was going down on me, I looked over his shoulder and said "ohh a Christian mingle commercial is on"
Executive order 941: BRING ME THE FINEST PANCAKES!
You have got to stop watching the West Wing before going out.
she's the poster child for how alcoholism can be fun.
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
Randomize
