no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
Taking a shot for every status related to the patriots losing. Hello hospital.
I've decided to turn your sobriety into a reason for me to be able to drink more.
It's my diet secret . . . it's like slimfast but I call it cockfast instead.
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
Stop banging my friends. This is getting weird.
Stop being friends with hot 18 year old girls.
Dude, you left ME alone in your house. With your fully-stocked wine cellar. Why would you do that to yourself?
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
Hungover playing piano at a baptism I am the PICTURE of class I feel like I should be struck by lightning
I fell asleep while eating jimmy johns last night and then woke up at 5am and continued to eat it
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
Randomize
