Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
He literally just walked in some random persons house and walked right to they're pantry. Then five minutes later he walks out with pop-tarts, mac and cheese, and captain morgan. We need to chill with this kid more often.
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
so just saw tiger woods pull a page out of his wifes book and hit some kid in the head with a golf club
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
Whoevers house this is has only beer and cream cheese in the fridge. Thats the diet im gonna go on
Jared is "trying to bite a strangers hat off" drunk. Oh, and that stranger is a girl at a table of 5 guys, one girl.
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
Ummmm you know you're drinking vodka out of a Skittles bag, right?
the worst part was waking up this morning to his skrillex ringtone.....when was it ever okay for friends to let other friends go home WITH GUYS LIKE THAT!?
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
Got caught peeing in public. Sucks. It was a police station. Sucks worse.
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
Got electrocuted a second ago, is it weird that I have a boner?
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
Randomize
