where am i from again
Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
i need you to recap everything for me beyond "i think i'm gonna try vodka-pong"
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
My epitaph should read "Margaritas: she never learned"
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
Out of curiosity, do you feel happiness for you, or sadness for ME, that you are the only one I drunk text?
At least he finally released me from his spooning oven of death...
There is a video recording of my birth. I have seen it. It is terrifying.
Once you jizz in someones hat, you cant take it back.
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
I turn 40 next week. I deserve to celebrate the end of my 30’s with a 21 year old dick
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