I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
how the FUCK am I supposed to macarena while doubble fisting?
somehow we got the entire party to start singing "ill make a man out of you" from mulan. needless to say, that kid had the best keg stand i'd ever seen.
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
I just realized I haven't got laid since the last time the Browns won.
I'm going through what feels like a break up with beer. I'm emotionally distraught from it's lack of presence.
That was the night I passed out and someone threw chicken at me. SORRY I wasn't available to cockblock you from that Hispanic dude.
I guess you know it was a good night when you find your ripped underwear in your pocket, and a nerf bullet falls out of your pant leg 😂😂
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
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