My dignity? Collapsing on itself like a dying star.
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
he came over wasted, used the bathroom, drank some water, and fell asleep holding my hand. what kind of a fuck buddy does that??
Scary. I thought trees were a lie and that someone ha permanently stenciled them into my life. No joke.
Bonus points if the penis has a little hat too
if i can hear my landlord's phone ring you think be can hear my vibrator?
I may or may not have definitely said the words "how do I put this beer in my purse without looking like an alcoholic" last night.
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
1. I'm excited for tonight 2. Do we dress up as pirates? 3. Happy Valentine's Day bae
Can I just keep holy water in the night stand next to the vibrator?
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
I managed to convince her that the egg yolks were actually orange juice and she fell for it
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