i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
I think I just saw the silver monkey from legends of the hidden temple sitting out in someone's trash
GO. BACK. NOW.
got arrested for "breaking and entering" last night when i supposedly went into the wrong house made a sandwich and tried jerking off to porn on the tv...the cops told me they came in while my dick was out...oh and i missed work this morning and got fired
I saved $70 from being to drunk to go out last night so I figured I could buy a new watch.
Dudeeeee, i ordered strippers for my party.
I ordered a moonbounce.
Fuck, you win.
He's the kind you'd bring home and you'd wake up and all your food would be half eaten on the kitchen floor and all your socks would be missing.
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
That's what tomorrow is for. It's like bloodletting. Except with shame and liquor.
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
This band has the most fuckable violin player I have ever seen.
The fact that the praying hands are in my top emojis defines how 2016 is going so far
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
Randomize
