I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
Just made a beer run. At 9am. In my pjs. I should not be graduating today
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
He sent me a picture of Reese's peanut butter cups next to his dick. Of course I went over.
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
I want a shirt that says, "I'm sorry for the things I said when it was Taco Tuesday"
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
My autobiography will be 500 pages of the words "I probably should've thought this through" typed over and over.
She was blacked out at her own party. It felt good to stand next to her while she laid on the floor and say "vomit does not look good on you."
Randomize
