He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
Your last words were "i'm gonna motorboat the bartender." then you commenced with an attempted motorboat
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
Note to self: trying to grow pubes back = worst decision of 2014 thus far
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
wtf guys I thought we agreed on no more knives. So much for not destroying the house
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
Pro tip: If you tell him that his dick looks like a muppet then you won't have to see him again.
Who is this? I have a text from you last night telling me your name and to train hard for Tuesday, please make this make sense
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
Randomize
