YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
my room smells like sperm. sweet.
birth control and beer are two of the most beautiful creations ever invented.
His dick was as big as my arm. Giving him a handjob was like giving someone an Indian sunburn.
You tried to get the stranger on the sea bus to give you a bite of his chicken sub by repeating over and over "im in a girl band"
please dont ever try to drink horizontally again. I thought I was going to have to give you cpr
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
Just convinced the cute guy from class that I have prostate cancer. GET ME OUT OF THIS TOWN!
Randomize
