Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
Found him. He was passed out on the couch at the new place in a room full of burnt pizza smoke.
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
Valuable lesson learned: if you reach the point where you have to talk yourself in to finishing the last half of your beer, you shouldn't try.
you passed out while setting up your phones timer to time how long it would take before you to passed out.
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
Did you know that pizza hut has a wedding proposal box? And sorry for being kinda drunk yesterday when you got here
I should come with a warning like "do not feed me tequila or cocaine, I will ruin the party and cry"
All I remember is an overwhelming desire for chicken nuggets...
Yes, you pinned my brother to the floor by the throat and threatened to slaughter his family if he didn't drive to mcdonalds and get you some.
When we got into his bed, his damn parrot started making sex noises in the other room
btw...it's noon and i'm sitting here drinking wine and eating pixie stix. I really need to find something to do...
Randomize
