Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
my life is in even more shambles than last time, mcdonalds is closed
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
She carries a brick in her purse. I wouldn't get in a fight with her
You left the resturant and came back with a McDonalds burger in your pocket so ya...no more pregaming birthday dinners. Especially since it wasn't your birthday.
My drunk neighbor is arguing with a goose in his yard. This was the highlight of my day.
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
Where are you? We're in between the guy dressed as a giant inflatable penis and the Justin Bieber lookalike lesbians
Does the penis have a genital wart?
I didn't pop out of a cake in a speedo with diagrams
In case that's what u were picturing
The selfie stick gets 5 stars bc it really added a fun element to my sex tape
It might be the most honest thing I've ever said. ...or I've had 3 vodka tonics.
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
It really hurts to walk. Any idea what happened to my hip?
Randomize
