I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
the not having weed thing wouldnt be nearly as tragic if it wasnt the one holiday where they launch bright flaming things into the air
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
I think the waitress doesn't beleive I have friends coming. I've had 4 drinks and a large salad just waiting for you guys.
My 10 year old son gave me a bottle of jameson for fathers day. Did you have something to do with this?
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
In the hospital waiting to be tested for the first uti of the school year....I'm BACK BTICHES.
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
Do you remember Kelly my alter personality? She talked like a man and would sing amazing grace?
I feel like "stop licking my face" isn't something that needs to be repeated twice
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
Is there a nice, calm way of telling your friend/housemate/former lover/person who does not reciprocate your feelings that your period is late?
Looking back at our past texts, the minute it turned 2020 you were cleaning your house and I was dying of the cold. We were prophesying the Rona.
Randomize
