so whats your words to drink to for the state of the union? mine are 'change' 'fight' and 'you know'.
mine is 'the'.
On a scale of 1 to last weekend, how hungover are you?
He kept trying to order 'sex on the tennis courts' for a drink last night
Have I told you recently that I love you, if for no other reason than you make my irresponsible substance abuse look tame by comparison?
Until you wake up with a Hustler club stripper in the next room whose nipple you were coerced to lick at Snake & Jake's after breaking up a fight between an Indian and a Filipino, I don't wanna hear about your weird.
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
It's a 'fuck poison control' kind of night.
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
HOLY FUCK I almost floated out of the city. Thank god my dog kept me down.
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
Just as an add on, don't expect me to wear matching bra and underwear. If I do, I'm probably drunk and it's your fucking birthday. Have a great night.
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