Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
This dude is being a total douche
Just because it's Christmas Eve does not mean the liquor store has to give you a free bottle of peppermint schnapps
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
I woke up with your vibrator in my face
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
I feel like my toilet water looks different when outsiders use my bathroom...
Are you high right now?
HOW DID YOU KNOW!
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
Randomize
