with your own penis?
3:47a: I take it you're not on your way over
You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
he stole me 6 pairs of frilly undies and proclaimed "your ass looks like a 5 in those. it'll be a 10 in these bad boys". every girl needs a gay bff.
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight.
those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
I can't sleep. My mind keeps asking "turn down for what?" but it won't accept any of my answers.
So hungover and decided to eat a burrito and a pot brownie for dinner, this is what adulthood looks like.
There is a cooked ham in the washing machine.
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
Fuck it. I'm going for it. You're only young once, right?
You've been saying that for 5 years now. Let me know when the novelty wears off.
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
Randomize
