new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
well I washed the adderal like an idiot. the capsules broke but the beads inside were intact. so my landlady came in and caught me licking the dryer lint screen
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
i saw her thong sticking out from across the bar...that was my cue
It was so delicious I was introducing it to people. Guy from my psych class was like "This is my girlfriend, Erica," and I was like, "This is my milkshake, Oreo."
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
Please just tell me how ugly she was so I can bask in the diminishingly small reassurance that might give me
I woke up on top of his counter next to a pot of boiling water and an empty package of ramen... what happened to the ramen, we will never know.
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
I don't need you anyway! I have puppies and booze!
I may or may not have puked in the ladies room. Now I get to convince my client to go to substance abuse treatment. Oh, the irony.
Dude, please tell me you know why there's a naked chick asleep outside my room.
How hot? Like... how many hemsworths?
Well, I just puked in the shower in case anyone wants an update on how my day is going
we got cockblocked by his mom again...its like she has a radar on me
please stop trying to sleep with him
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