well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
He keeps apologizing for not being able to get hard when he's drunk. We havent even left the club yet.
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
We were on the balcony tossing jello shots to people passing below
When people said no i'd yell "i tried them i promise they aren't roofied!"
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
i don't know what part of 'duct tape bikini waxes' seemed even a little okay in our drunk minds, but i'm never drinking with your sister again
Her next conquest seems to be stealing her ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend. Pretty sure everyone involved is totally OK with this.
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
dropping lines from Workaholics has slowly become my icebreaker when hitting on girls. who would have thought "lets get weird" would cause girls to actually get weird
TELL HER ABOUT THE GODDAMNED MOTHERFUCKING POTATOES
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
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