Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
how do we leave politely?
Tell them I'm going into labor. I will spill a beer and tell them m water broke.
Professor used "ROFL" while grading my paper... Do I even go to a real college?
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
There was a punch bowl full of straight vodka. Glass bowl, ladle, vodka, and no punch at all. It was something of a rough night
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
Don't forget ur talking to the master juggler. Remember that time I slept with 3 guys and made them all pay for plan b? Paid the rent didn't I?
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
There are peanut butter donuts now. We are playing with forces we can't possibly understand.
Things were going really well until his cousin showed up. She told him I look kind of like his mom, which started a ten-minute debate on my and his mother's specific features, and ultimately, who is prettier. Guess who my date picked.
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
Randomize
