Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
No. I'm drinking straight up vodka right now. With a pineapple in it.
That'll put some boobs in that bra.
Also, I guess I made friends with the guy who caught me peeing behind a bush.
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
i need to stop establishing animals as safe words. Giraffe and Penguin are really awkward words to say during sex
also, sleeping with your chipotle guy sounds like a good idea until you want chipotle on your day off and have to look somewhat presentable to acquire said chipotle.
Like the friend zone has no room for winks
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
Oh, do you remember telling everyone you were with that your vagina was angry last night?
Randomize
