I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
That taco smell coming from your belly button was a huge turnoff
so i wake up and the chick who i had sex last night left her phone number. next to the number was a broken condom. should i call?
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
He was making a joke about signing my name on this piece of paper. He has a whole bucket filled with names on pieces of paper. I think thats how he keeps count.
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
Why would you get kicked out?
Well, an overweight man is currently not wearing a shirt. Or pants. And is getting in touch with his inner Chippendale. You can probably fill in the blanks.
Apparently karate chopping the fronts off all the paper towel and soap dispensers in the bathrooms isn't even frowned upon. Like even at the third bar when I fell flat on my back trying to jump kick the last one some guy just helped me up and high fived me. America.
My husband is waiting until son is napping and air humps as a seduction tactic. Pray for me.
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