Getting fucked up met up rando with a girl I confesswed my love for last night. weird, going with it
Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
Sometimes I seriously wonder if I could get away with vodka Sundays at work. Cuz this red bull feels naked.
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
I have learned that if you don't want to hook up with the guy who walked you home, food is great compensation.
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
All of my friends are hooking up and here I am, the lone asexual, looking for someone to eat these tostitos with me.
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
It’s 830 am and the amount of Valentine’s Day snaps I’ve already seen makes me either want to vom, drink a bottle of wine, or buy chocolate
1000% No lie I was just looking on insta and was thinking about taking a bottle of wine to the face..
tonight's safe word is brought to you by the phrase "Ahhhhhh"
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
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