What a fucking waste of an outfit
The party tonight has no theme but I decided to go as a home wrecker.
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
Can u please come get me. My car keys are gone. Somehow I ended up sleeping in my trunk
She can drink whiskey without a chaser and has a fridge full of whipped cream. Girlfriend potential
The word cocktail makes me want to rip my liver out and nail it to a cross.
If you take a couple more shots you won't even know he's a mormon that drives a mini van.
First of all guys don't have walks of shame. Secondly there is nothing more epic than riding the skytrain in a toga while everyone else is going to work
He tried to tell me that he could handle his liquor better than "all the bitches in this town." AS HE THREW UP. ALL. OVER.
Wow, I just woke up in this conference with the woman beside me staring at me. This is what happens when hungover people sit in warm rooms...
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
I haven't reeked of cheap beer and poor decisions in months. I officially hate adult life.
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
Do you remember seeing anyone put a "my other penis is a vagina" bumper sticker on my car?
Randomize
