I may or may not have started my period at the bar. Good thing I have dark jeans on.
Any day that starts with a call from my ex-bf... crying... is a good day.
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
i wasn't about to bring her gummy handcuffs to her father's funeral
The fact that both my ribs are severely bruised from shoving flasks in my bra might be a validation of my mothers alcoholic accusation
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
My sheer presence has sent the hipsters running in terror. I expect no problems.
Dude, you stalking his LINKEDIN profile will NOT affect your chances with him. We aren't 40...
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
I'm laying in bed cuddling with my teddy bear and eating waffles. I need a fucking boyfriend
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
Randomize