my head feels like I tried to put alcohol out of business last night
dude you were so wasted last night you ate a sandwich made out of tomatos, cheese, doritos, salt & pepper. Then you heated it in the micro for 5 min to melt the cheese.
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
I'm relatively certain my chiropractor just judged me for admitting that my back is misaligned from the sex we had last night...
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
Im about to shotgun a beer using my mother's knitting needles. home sweet home.
dude this night sums up my single life. naked, crying, and covered in honey. i need to get laid.
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
I'm in the power napping at parties stage of my life
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
Randomize
