i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine
I just saw a dog and thought "Hey! A goat!" Then realized it was a dog. Now I'm sad.
theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
I feel like it'll be a success as long as she doesn't end up dead in a ditch. There has to be a line somewhere.
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
I'm going to fuck every single member of the men's olympic swimming team and no one is going to stop me
I wish i could just live off of margaritas and good sex.
I did the walk of shame in nothing but a sleeping bag and now I'm on my way to pick up plan B. Let's not make a habit of this.
Sounds like a good New Years
He probably thinks you're playing hard to get.
Hard to get?? I'm playing leave me the fuck alone.
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
I'm the catering manager, it's not my job to stop 2 teenagers from fucking in the bathroom. I couldn't bring myself to stop that sort of young romance anyway, that's what I pay you people for
The ass gains better be worth it
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