Dual....:-)
opening your purse in class to grab a pen only to find dollar bills and pink fuzzy handcuffs instead...that's a cool feeling
Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
after we had sex last night he told me he smelled like my vagina. and then he said that if his roommate had a vagina he would probably smell like it. because "they hug weird and shit."
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
I vaguely remember having a 'grass is greener' conversation about our nipples. Dream or beautiful reality?
Beautiful, beautiful reality
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
You're the third Mark I've fucked in that bed.
Always keep a stash of tequila in your work desk. That is like adulting 101.
All I wanted was to die alone with my dogs....how did I end up here
I don't know if I should laugh or punch you
andy told me i got kicked out of the bar and was so drunk i forgot and got back in line. the bouncer was zero impressed
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
Randomize
