So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
Just ate cheeseit crumbs off the floor. i feel like Kirstie Alley.
I have to talk to myself and be all "you are NOT horny tonight"
I'm going to need to borrow your helmet cam for my Wednesday night blackouts.
Oh my god I just remembered I bit a stripper last night.
History professor is at the bar. Hurry! There's only so many A's he could give before it starts to look bad.
He shoved his balls through an egg carton and showed us a picture. They were surprisingly egg-like.
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
Showed up physical therapy hammered. The therapist just says this isnt part of the program.
I'm closer to stabbing a fork in my neck than finishing this resume.
If someone plays phil collins i'm gonna take off my clothes
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
Randomize