Midnight walks are trippy
I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.
I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
My professor just gave everyone in the class extra credit... except for the kid wearing the Cubs hat
I was just informed that I have the perfect belly button for body shots... Best compliment ever.
Ok well hopefully you're not staging an intervention for me at your place because I'm bringing beers
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
My lunch = taste testing salsas for A&P. They gave me a free 64oz grape juice as a thank you. So, now we have something to drink in the house. So while you are spending all the money on breakfast rolls and pizza for lunch, I'm cigaretteless and whoring myself for tablespoons of salsa and free juice.
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
I didn't have cash to pay cover at the bar, so I traded the bouncer a Krispy Kreme doughnut i had in my purse
Idk I wanna make it till midnight but I also want tequila
I need two food groups: booze and turkey sandwiches
You know I've done a lot of messed up stuff. But I never thought I would have to put a bandaid on my dick. Yet here we are.
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
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