i just found a bag of weed behind my capital one card. i guess that's what's in my wallet.
Even the bartender felt bad for me
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
If you were a real friend you would have told me you saw me in a porno despite how awkward of a convo it is. You act like I should always know when I'm being recorded.
I could have made money off of that but no you had to wait 2 years to drunkenly tell me this shit.
Had the longest conversation today with a potentially homeless cuban woman about mind control.
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
Wake up. Finish House of Cards. Put on pants.
Accurate.
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
He lit a candle for the mood and ended up lighting my hair on fire while we were hooking up...moodkiller
Ok so I'm not gonna ignore the fact that you had sex on a frat basement floor and spent the last 4 years wondering how you got HPV
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
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