Don't make out with my wife yet
I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
I need hand sanitizer and jesus.
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
he stopped midthrust to put on his sex playlist and the first song was 'can you feel the love tonight'
where do you find these guys?
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
What would you do if your asshole suddenly made the sound of a sheep duck baa/quacking the words kill me
You are so incredibly one of a kind, it's astounding
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
Why so philosophical about cake and sex this morning?
They both showed up at the same time... to surprise me. One had flowers and the other had chocolates. Needless to say, I will be at the bar all weekend long trying to figure out how this happens.
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
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