Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
Somehow I managed to make my Dunkin Donuts uniform look slutty. And I'm not even wearing hoops.
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
just woke up on my balcony. who won the super bowl?
I put the condom across her upper lip. It was like a mustache of a job well done.
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
Tequilla is a sneaky bitch ninja that doesn't kick in until you least expect it. Then BAM! You're peeing in unconventional places.
There is a pool of ranch salad dressing in my purse...I know thats always been something you've wanted to try..so don't even act like you didn't do this.
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
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