Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
Just took a closer look at the paper that kid wrote me his number on. It was an ATM receipt. His balance is $17.89. i made the right choice.
Dude you can sell sperm for 100 to 250 bucks a time. And the best part is there will be kids all over the world that will have me as a daddy. It's like I'm jerking off my way into ruling the world
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
woke up wearing a canadian flag with the starting forward of the hockey team. i feel oddly patriotic
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
I just took three of the most beautiful hits of my life. As elegant and smooth and delicate and graceful as figure skating
Fuck me this girl I went home with has a cover on her remote control so there is no spills to ruin it. Imagine how many condoms she's going to make me wear
I washed my sheets. I did out of respect for my previous and current sexual partners.
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
My manager gave me an envelope with money in it before he had vacation, and when I asked what it was for, he said it will be his bail money.
I woke up this morning hand cuffed to the bed with three bruised ribs and Amy written in lipstick on my chest... what happen lastnite??
Randomize
