Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
I wish they made sweatshirts for legs
you mean pants?
I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
Just saw a girl i'm pretty sure is simultaneously jailbait and a milf. I never want to leave mexico.
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
I punted my pants across my apt at my roommate last night. Everything else is kinda fuzzy.
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
Two cats fucking in the middle of the street. I sat there and watched in my car because I didn't want to cock block the male by honkin my horn.
Every time I'm hungover I just want to watch Harry Potter and cry.
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
I use my feet as sexual weapons
My life is pants optional.
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
Randomize
