North Korea, Best Korea!
You can call me Bill Clinton. I brought 2 good looking Asians home last night.
I was just at the bank and there was a fat lady wearing a cape. today is gonna be awesome.
Last night you told her she was rocking the beer gut. Still wondering why you have that black eye?
i just got a clause named after me in the 'alcohol and drug use' section of the handbook. this is certainly a warning sign.
I woke up at 3am naked and stroking a watermelon.
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
I'm drinking coffee out of a pasta sauce jar and eating fruit soaked in Smirnoff. I think I've hit rock bottom.
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
Nothing like a dick pic from your fave ex to make you audibly exhale sadly.
Found your brother. He was passed out in the tub holding a bottle of Shatto milk wearing nothing but his tighty-whities.
I need to get laid. Right now that freshman frat pledge & my Econ professor are the leading candidates
That’s quite a spread
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