Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
yeah, you were trying to hump the doorman.
when did we get a doorman?
we were also in the wrong building...
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
Let's have a moment of silence for the guinea pig that drunk chick threw out our window.
He came in my nose, then said it would help clear my sinuses.
Sorry no. I've already promised my first single hookup to somebody.
Well duh, alcohol and getting fucked up are the world's common languages.
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
One day I'll learn not to get drunk on a plane. Today is not that day.
I walked in describing her boobs thinking I was talking to you only to hear dad say 'I remember when your moms were like that'. ALWAYS tell me when they get home early. Always
Note to self, the correct response when a guy tells you he likes you as a person is not "ew"
He's literally cuddling with the washer and dryer.
you tried to make the parrot smoke your joint
Randomize
