What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
Last night I saw a drag queen take a shot of Red Hot that was soaked into a tampon. I fucking love my life!
he breathalyzed me before we had sex.
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
You were telling me to give my phone mouth to mouth so it wouldn't die.. Should i be worried for you?
She said that I needed to "pregame her so it can slip right in."
Drunkenly auctioned off my bed for 3 tequila shots
she has an amazing ass but I need more beers to get past her horse face. It works out perfect becauseI can use her teeth as a bottle opener.
Just once I'd like to throw a party where I don't have to clean up someone else's blood the next morning.
We never did figure out who the stuff on the wall came from, did we?
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
I should never be allowed to dance around children at weddings. I think I just insured that a 4 year old will be a future teen mom.
Randomize
