what is it about summer that misdirects my moral compass so much?
I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
i just got the best bj of my life in the pastors office at church.. Youre right jesus really does love me.
So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
This conversation has now reached a level of awkward that even a passerby streaking hobo couldn't break.
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
I was grossed out that all their candles smelled like vagina and then I remembered where my fingers had been.
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
You're now part of the minority of friends who haven't seen my boobs.
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
Randomize
