It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
Apparently after taking body shots off of a guy i haven't seen since 1st grade, i ate a stick of butter, showed everyone my tampon string, and fell off the boat. my uggs belong to the sea now
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
Laying on my kitchen floor and the lights just got brighter... I just died or there was a power surge. Based on the amount of booze I drink both are possible.
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan.
Drunk you assumed that me saying I thought squirrels were cute meant for you to trap one in my car by luring it in with ham. You're going to hell for this.
Remember that time you came over to my house and I was on the porch naked and eating peanut butter?
The bag I'm bringing home for the weekend: a change of clothes, workout shoes, and sex toys, that's it.
Strip clubs just aren't as fun when a man tries to drunkenly grind on you.
Was it you that ate my bacon or do I have to rip my roommate's face off?
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
Randomize
