I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
Some guy on the train just glared at me. So I'm drinking tequilla out of a dixie cup. Go fuck yourself.
Thursdays are my worst days
but now we sippin champagne when we thirstay?
my neighbors garage sale is really cutting into the time of day when i can smoke weed on my deck.
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal
hey watch out, they threw flour on everyone who passed out at their party last year.
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
So I've discovered that being hungover at 25 feels the same as being hungover at 24. Happy Birthday to me.
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
i ordered what the bartender said was called a pink cock, and kept saying it tastes like a disney princess. thats how my 21st bday went
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