I want to snug with you.
You want my snuggie?
Call me Kermit cause I'm about to go piggin
I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
i actually just woke up with a lampshade on my head. god damn cliches.
Oh, and thanks to you. I'm now stuck in the living room, held hostage, listening to my roommate's "How I discovered I was bi" story. FUCK YOU.
I feel like my teeth are caked on with other teeth. What did I just smoke?
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
she got kicked out of the bar for shoving german chocolate cake in the bartenders face. we were there less than a minute
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
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